Hippocratic Oath
by CrystalOfEllinon
Summary: A plot bunny that's been refusing to leave me alone...Carl Greer had to discover that ninja make the worst patients at some point. Rated M because I am categorically incapable of writing a SE/S fiction without some sweet sweet lovin' in it at some point.
1. Chapter 1

Hippocratic Oath.

In which Carl Greer finds out that ninja make the worst patients…

Iron body training causes microscopic fractures in the crystalline structure of the bones, which cause the body to deposit more calcium and thicken and toughen the bone structure as the tissue heals.

* * *

"_SNAKE EYES!_"

Scarlett screamed the name, watching Snake pelt towards the flaming Sky Striker. Her boyfriend ignored her. Ace was (hopefully, because the alternative was much worse) unconscious inside, slumped over his control panel. There was a spatter of blood on the cockpit dome, and fresh bullet holes ran in a long jagged line down the side of the plane. Cobra heavy machine gun fire had caught Ace's fighter as he tried to take off, and the plane had crashed back to earth, flames moving towards the fuel tanks with frightening speed.

The Cobra ambush was already being dealt with; the attack force hadn't been large. But now Snake Eyes, being Snake Eyes, was running _towards _a flaming deathtrap of a plane that could explode any second, and Scarlett couldn't do anything but watch her boyfriend risk his life in an effort to save the helpless, possibly dead fighter pilot.

The ninja scrambled up the plane, and then he was pulling shards of broken cockpit glass out of the way and scrabbling his way over ruined instrument panels. A few cuts with his trench knife, and Ace's restraint webbing gave way.

The ninja dragged the pilot out of the cockpit, and Scarlett watched in horror as the flames licked at the fuel tanks. "Snake! It's going to blow!" She heard Flint behind her, already radioing for the medics…Scarlett hoped desperately that Ace was the only one who would need them.

Snake Eyes didn't need goading. He moved for the edge of the plane, and jumped for the ground.

He'd almost landed when the Sky Striker went up in a spectacular fireball. Scarlett heard herself screaming as she watched Snake and Ace flung through the air like rag dolls, but then Snake was twisting himself in the air, and Scarlett realized that he was alive. But then he was pulling Ace around, and using his own body to break the injured pilot's impact on the ground. Snake Eyes crunched into the hard-packed earth of the Arizona desert with enough force to make everyone watching wince in unison, and Ace landed on top of the ninja.

They lay there, limp. Scarlett was pelting towards her lover, and Lifeline was right behind her, trailed by any of the Joes not busy chasing down the last of the squad of vipers who'd managed to find the Joe's supposedly secret live-fire training range.

Lifeline had Ace on a stretcher, and was saying something to the Joe's moving the injured-not dead, thank God-pilot towards the helicopter. Scarlett reached for Snake Eye's wrist, feeling desperately for a pulse. The ninja made no response, his hand limp in hers.

There. A heartbeat, strong and steady. _Thank_ _you, oh, thank you god._

"He's unconscious." Lifeline was stating the obvious. "That was a helluva fall; he's probably concussed, and I wouldn't be surprised if he's got a cracked skull…" The medic ran experienced hands over the prone ninja. "No, skull's intact…tough bastard…but this feels like a cracked femur. Help me get him on the stretcher, Red."

She did. Minutes later, and both men were on a troop transport, Scarlett hovering nervously. Lifeline removed Ace's flight helmet; the source of the pilot's injury was obvious. Judging from the twisted plastic and wires over Ace's left ear, a bullet had clipped the man. There was blood matted in the pilot's hair, but Lifeline breathed a soft sigh of relief.

"Just clipped him; he probably lost consciousness when he crashed. He'll be fine." The medic cleaned the cut and applied a pressure bandage.

Snake Eyes stirred, and he suddenly sat abruptly upright. Lifeline yelped in alarm and jumped towards the ninja. "Snake! Careful!"

The ninja ignored him. Seeing Ace laid out with a bandage on his head, the commando went to stand, every line of his body radiating concern. His right leg buckled underneath him, and Scarlett heard his hiss of pain. She shoved a shoulder under his arm and helped him back onto the stretcher.

"You've got a broken leg." Lifeline said dryly. "But I think that you just figured that out, didn't you?"

Snake shot him a look that was scorching even through a visor. *Ace?*

"Will be fine, thanks to you. He got clipped, but the cut is superficial. He's got a nasty concussion from bouncing his forehead off of his instrument panel, but he'll pull through. Incidentally, how's your head feel?"

*Like it got run over by a truck.* Snake Eyes admitted. He glanced at Scarlett. *How…*

"The rest of the team took care of the vipers." She assured him. "You scared me, you know."

*Sorry.* Snake Eyes shook his head suddenly as if to clear it, then winced as if he regretted the motion.

"Dizzy?" Lifeline asked keenly. "Nauseated at all?"

*A little.*

"You're concussed…take your visor off for a minute."

Snake Eyes obeyed, but left his mask on. Lifeline leaned over and examined the ninja's eyes with a penlight. "Pupils aren't dilated…no hemorrhaging, then. I can give you some painkillers for the headache and to take some of the pain out of the leg until we can get it set, but I can't do a whole lot else for you, I'm afraid."

Snake Eyes shook his head, carefully. *I'll be fine.*

Duke poked his head into the transport. "How are our ninja and our pilot doing?" He caught sight of Snake. "Good to see you alive, man."

"Ace got clipped, but it isn't bad. He picked up a concussion in the crash, but he'll pull through…I don't see any symptoms of internal bleeding. Snake Eyes managed to concuss himself and crack his right femur, but you can see he's already alert and refusing medical help, so he'll be fine."

"Good." Duke nodded. "Thanks for saving our air support's ass, Snake Eyes. I'm sure he'll be grateful too, when he wakes up. That was insane, though…you're lucky you didn't get vaporized."

*I'm a ninja. Exploding planes cannot kill us.*

"You're completely crazy, but you know that, don't you?" Duke shook his head. "We're moving out in a few minutes." He vanished.

Snake scooted up just a bit to lean back against the transport wall. He turned to look at Lifeline. *How bad is my leg?*

"I think it's just a hairline, but it's hard to tell without an x-ray. Your bone is still inside your leg, though, so you'll claim to be fine, won't you?" The medic sighed as the ninja smiled a bit.

"Ignore him if he does." Scarlett leveled a finger at Snake. "You _will not_ request an Ace bandage and a sturdy stick this time, buster."

*Yes, ma'm.* Snake signed meekly. Scarlett glared, not fooled. He sighed, winced. *I'll be good. For awhile.*

Scarlett sighed. Snake Eyes hated medical confinement with a passion…something that the new G.I. Joe medic, Carl Greer, hadn't run into yet. So far, the ninja had managed to escape from serious harm, and Doc hadn't yet had to do more than stitch up a few superficial cuts for the commando.

The engine of the troop transport growled to life, and Scarlett felt the familiar little dip in the pit of her stomach as they lifted off.

* * *

Several hours and a couple thousand miles later, and Snake Eyes was scowling up at the two medics as Doc frowned at the x-rays that he'd taken of the ninja's leg. Ace was awake, and complaining loudly that he wanted to get out of bed and go blow a few thousand vipers up. As far as Snake could tell, the pilot was more infuriated that his plane had been destroyed than because he'd been hurt.

Doc and Lifeline were ignoring the pilot. Doc glanced down at Snake Eyes, who was sitting with arms crossed over his chest, waiting for the doctor to speak. He shook his head.

"You are one lucky man." Doc said. "I have no idea how you not only managed to survive that fall, but how you managed not to crack your skull and at least ten other bones…and this leg is just an incomplete hairline fracture. It should be in splinters."

Doc frowned at the x-ray again. "You've got some odd bone density readings, here, actually."

*Iron body.* Snake Eyes signed. Doc raised an eyebrow.

"Come again?"

*Iron body…training the body to take greater punishment. Causes bones to harden.* Snake Eyes elaborated. *When I was with the Arishikage family, our masters used to make us spend two hours a day kicking trees, punching buckets of sand, breaking poles over our arms and ribs, breaking boards with our skulls.* The memory of a thousand bruises, and he smiled. Then regretted it; his head still throbbed and spun.

"Ah." Doc's second eyebrow had joined the first. "Well…that would explain why you've got roughly three times the bone density of an average man…and why you didn't break yourself into bite sized bits. _Ninja._" He sighed, shook his head. "You are completely crazy, you know."

*Comes with the training.* Snake Eyes shrugged.

"Well, you won't be doing any training for a few weeks." Doc said. "I'm going to put a cast on you. Fortunately," The medic smiled a little at the ninja's disgusted snort. "It isn't a bad break, so it won't be the clumsy monstrosity that you're afraid of. I'll put a walking cast on you, so you should still have good mobility and won't need crutches."

Snake Eyes smiled. *That sounds good.*

Lifeline coughed slightly. "Doc? You sure that's a good idea?"

Carl Greer eyed the junior medic. "I really don't see the need for a full-on cast, son…unless you know something I don't."

Snake Eyes caught Lifelines gaze. The medic gulped. "No…Just, well, ninja. You know?"

"Oh, I'm sure Snake Eyes will be careful." Doc smiled. "I'd also like to keep you for observation for at least a week…hard head notwithstanding, you took a hard fall, and I want to make sure that you rest up; it's the best medicine for a concussion."

"Yes…" Lifeline hesitated. "Rest." He trailed off, but Snake Eyes still caught his muttered words. "Like we _won't_ be getting."

Snake Eyes leaned back against his pillow and smiled to himself.

Several hours later, and Scarlett was sitting on the edge of his bed and examining the lightweight walking cast that Doc had fitted him with. She sighed. "He really doesn't know you, does he?"

*You act like I'm going to bolt from the room at any second.*

"You are." She patted him on the arm. "Don't try to deny it; I know you, Snake. Just please hold off the escape for a day or so? You took a hard fall, and I'd feel better if you take it easy for at least a little bit."

*I'm fine, Shana.* He reached over and ran the pad of his thumb over her cheekbone. *A little battered, but fine.*

She leaned into his touch. "One day. Please?"

*Very well…only for you.*

"I love you too, big guy." She smiled down at him. "Even if you seem to think that you have adamantium bones and a healing factor."

*You've been watching too many Saturday morning cartoons.* Snake Eyes considered. *Though that would be nice.*

"If you two can't keep your hands off of each other, at least pull the curtain back so I can watch." Ace's voice came from the other side of the privacy curtain that Doc had erected between the two beds. "Snake, you can keep your clothes on."

Scarlett glared in Ace's direction. "You wish, flyboy."

"I do." Ace sounded plaintive. "Snake Eyes stole the remote control. I'm stuck with watching the National Geographic channel. I'm going slowly crazy without a distraction here."

Scarlett eyed Snake. He grinned. *They're running a special on 'the myth and truth of Japan's shadow warriors'. I want to see how much they get right.*

She laughed, leaned down, and kissed him on the forehead. "I'll be back later. One day."

*One day. I promise."

* * *

Next chapter, and Doc learns that keeping a ninja somewhere that he doesn't want to be is a difficult proposition.

I will update my story "Duty as Usual soon, too, but I've had this new story bouncing around in my head and refusing to leave me alone, so I gave up trying to ignore it.


	2. Chapter 2

Betting, cable programming, and ninja do not take well to bed rest.

* * *

Snake Eyes eventually let Ace have the remote control, and meditated rather than watch the cartoons that the pilot tuned the infirmary's television set to. Arranging himself into lotus took some creative positioning, but he managed. When Duke poked his head in an hour later, Snake Eyes nodded to the top sergeant cordially but didn't move otherwise.

"Please tell me that Doc didn't put you in a walking cast and then order bed rest." Duke groaned when Snake Eyes uncurled his legs, showing the lightweight, rubber soled contraption that came to just below the knee. "Sonova…" Duke sighed. "Well, the man has to learn sometime, I suppose."

*Everyone is acting like I'm going to vanish at any moment.* Snake Eyes did his best to look innocent. *I'm still here, aren't I?*

"Scarlett's bullied you into submission for the first few days, hasn't she?"

Snake Eyes just smiled. Duke heaved another sigh. "How long do we have before we start playing 'find the ninja'?"

Snake folded his legs again, rested his hands on his knees, and closed his eyes.

"Fine. I'm not going to help him look when you disappear, though. Just don't hurt yourself." Snake heard the door click closed, and the retreating sound of boots against the hallway floor.

"Not fair." Ace spoke up suddenly.

Snake opened his eyes, reached over, and tugged the curtain back to eye the pilot curiously.

"I can't even get a pool going on how many times you slip out before Doc gives up." Ace paused. "Unless…Scarlett will be in later, right?"

Snake Eyes nodded.

"Maybe she'll get the word around…people would come to me, if they knew I was running the betting. Hey, Snake? How many times did you escape the last guy before he gave up? Just for a base idea of what kind of odds I might be looking at here."

*Seven.* Snake signed, amused.

"Okay." Ace nodded. "Seven, got it…thanks, man. You want to put anything down on yourself?"

*No. Wouldn't be fair, but thank you for the offer. " Snake Eyes smiled.

"Yeah, that's a good point. I'll see if Lifeline wants to put anything down when he comes in." Ace lay back, looking much happier at the possibility of gambling in the future.

Snake Eyes fell back into meditation. He only roused himself when he smelled a distinctive, savory…_aroma_ was really the only proper term.

Lifeline and two trays came through the door moments later. The trays had Snake's full attention. Ace's too; the pilot's grin almost took in his ears.

"Is that _steak?"_

"It is, courtesy of Roadblock. Just for you two."

"If that man was prettier, I'd marry him." Ace said fervently.

"I'll let him know." Lifeline handed over the food. "I'm not sure that he feels the same about you, though."

"Who's getting married?" Scarlett trailed in, holding her own tray. "Hey…_we_ didn't get steak…"

*Ace is proposing to Roadblock.* Snake Eyes balanced his tray on his knees. Scarlett dragged a chair over to sit beside him, tugged the curtain shut, and balanced her own food on the edge of the bed.

"Cute. I hope the kids take after Roadblock instead of their mother." She poked at her food. "Well, we did get Salisbury steak…not quite the same, though."

"Ha, ha." Ace's voice was muffled by what sounded like a sizable mouthful. "Funny. She's a funny woman. I'll remember that comment the next time you call for air support."

"I'm guessing that neither of you are feeling nauseated any longer." Lifeline's voice was dry.

"A little, but I don't give a damn. It's _steak._" Ace said happily. "I should get shot more often."

"Please don't."

"Oh!" Ace sounded serious now. "Hey, Scarlett? Could you maybe send the word around, quiet-like, that I'm going to be taking bets on the duration of Snake Eyes' bed rest and how many times Doc mobilizes a manhunt? Thanks."

Scarlett sighed, resigned. "I'll put the word out. Give me fifty on him slipping the medics at least five times." She eyed Snake. "I would rather lose this bet, by the way."

Snake Eyes just smiled at her over his tray.

"Give me the same on four." Lifeline heaved a long-suffering sigh. "Doc'll give up after that."

"Got it." There was the sound of a pen scratching over paper. Ace always carried both.

*You know, a man might feel pressure to perform.* Snake signed to Shana. *Otherwise, people are going to be disappointed.*

She smacked him on the shoulder. "Shut up and eat."

Later, he dozed off as Ace was watching monster truck racing. When he woke, it was to Doc's humming as the medic opened the door.

"Hello." Doc sounded cheerful. "Lifeline said that you both kept Roadblock's grilled sirloin down, so I'm guessing that you aren't nauseated. Good to hear." He examined both of them. "Headaches getting worse? Any sudden dizziness?"

Snake Eyes shook his head. *I'm fine.*

"No, you are not. Your leg is still broken; you won't be 'fine' for six to eight weeks. But I'm glad that you are feeling better."

"My head still hurts a little, but not badly." Ace said.

"Well, that's to be expected. Your concussion was pretty bad. I can give you some painkillers for that, if you'd like."

Medicine dispensed, Doc left. Ace started flipping through channels rapid-fire. Finally, Snake Eyes pulled the curtain back and glared. *Pick one, or I'll take the remote back.*

"Killjoy." Ace flipped to professional wrestling. Snake Eyes watched for a few minutes, and then raised an eyebrow.

*People pay money to go and watch this?* He snorted.

"Snake, Snake." Ace shook his head. "You don't watch wrestling for the fights." He considered. "Well, not just for the fights. Scarlett ever watch soap operas?"

*No.* Thank _god._

"Lucky bastard…anyways, half the fun of wrestling is the drama and the feuds and the backstabbing. It's a man's soap opera; drama with choke slams."

Snake Eyes watched for a few more minutes, and then felt his eyebrows reach for his hairline. He snorted again. *And the 'lingerie pillow fights' have nothing to do with why you watch this, right?*

"Uh?" Ace's eyes were glued to the screen.

*Never mind.* Snake Eyes closed his eyes and dozed off again.

The next thirteen hours were excruciatingly boring. Snake dozed on and off, chatted with Scarlett when she dropped by, and decided that Ace had possibly the worst taste in cable programming ever.

Then, finally, the clock clicked over to exactly three seventeen in the afternoon; twenty four hours to the second after he had promised Scarlett to stay put for one day. Snake stood, and was pleased to find that he could indeed move fairly easily in the walking cast. Even better, the rubber sole allowed him to move silently.

He limped to the door, glanced both ways. No one was in sight. He slid across the hall, into a storage closet. In the back, he shifted several mop handles out of the way and then pressed hard on the left hand panel of plywood that made up the closet walls.

It swung inwards. It had taken Snake Eyes many hours and a _lot _of careful, furtive work to construct hidden panels in convenient locations around the Pit, but it had been worth the effort. He eased his way into the narrow space inside the wall, shut the secret panel, and felt his way along the pitch-black path.

Fifteen minutes, and he could hear activity outside in the hallway. He paused, pressed his ear against the wall. A few seconds were enough to assure him that his escape had been noticed.

He emerged from his hidden passageway around the corner, conveniently near to a air return duct along the base of the wall; he wasn't sure how his leg would handle wall-climbing right now.

Into the ventilation, and then it was an easy shot up to his quarters. Feeling quite pleased with himself, he showered, careful of his cast, and then settled on the edge of his bed and examined the edge on his sword before reaching for his polishing kit.

An hour later, and he'd worked his way over his sword, trench knife, and the throwing knives from his left boot. He started to strip down his Uzis. They'd not been cleaned yet after the recent engagement, and he'd been wanting to give them some attention.

He finished one before there was a sharp rapping at his door. He ignored it. It sounded again, harder.

"Snake Eyes!" It was Duke's voice

Snake carefully reassembled his gun, then limped his way to the door and pulled it open.

*Yes?* He signed calmly *I thought that you weren't going to be looking for me.* Duke glowered at the ninja. Doc was standing right behind the top sergeant, and at the sight of the ninja pushed past Duke.

"Why aren't you in the infirmary?" Doc asked sharply.

*Because I got bored.* Snake Eyes signed, reasonably.

"I told you to rest!"

*I am taking it easy. I'm just doing something useful at the same time.* Snake nodded at the weaponry spread over his bed.

Doc didn't seem to agree. He glared at the ninja. "Back to your bed. In the infirmary. How'd you get all the way up here without being seen, anyways?"

*Ninja.* Snake Eyes pointed out.

"Ha, ha. Infirmary. Now."

Snake Eyes sighed and followed them. *I'll just leave again, you know.*

Doc's eyes glittered. "We'll see. You aren't the first reluctant patient I've had, you know."

Duke heaved a sigh. "You've never had a ninja in your care before, have you?"

Snake Eyes smiled.

* * *

Poor Doc…he still doesn't know what he's gotten into.


	3. Chapter 3

Ahh, Doc…I'm sorry for all the pain I'm causing you.

* * *

Back in the infirmary, Snake Eyes let himself be bullied back into bed.

One of the nice things about keeping his eyes hidden most of the time, he reflected, was that it made it difficult for everyone but Scarlett to read him. Thus, he was easily able to feign attentiveness as Doc lectured him about the dangers of ignoring medical advice and pushing himself so soon after an injury.

After the first five minutes, he shut his eyes and slid into meditation. He kept up his appearance of interest by tracking Doc's footsteps and keeping his face turned to the medic. It was another few minutes before Ace's voice broke through his contemplation.

"He's not listening to you anymore, Doc." The pilot was chuckling. "Even if he was, he'd ignore every word."

Snake Eyes opened his eyes and shot the pilot a glare that made the man wince even through his visor. *I'm taking the remote back for that.*

"Sorry, man." Ace looked apologetic. "I just hate to watch the Doc shouting himself hoarse at you when I know you're not hearing a word."

Doc pinched the bridge of his nose. "Please tell me he's wrong, Snake Eyes."

*He's wrong.* Snake signed agreeably.

"Now you're just lying." Doc sighed. "I prescribed bed rest for a reason; concussion symptoms can flare up for up to a week after the incident."

*I'm fine.* Snake Eyes frowned at the doctor. *I've completed missions with several ounces of high-caliber metal in my body. I've climbed buildings with bleeding knife wounds. I've escaped high-security detention facilities after being knocked out with a two-by-four. I can handle light duty with a cast.*

Doc groaned. Ace was laughing. Finally, Carl Greer shook his head and leveled a finger in a threatening sort of manner at Snake's chest. "Prior achievements notwithstanding, you are my responsibility as long as you are under my care. I want you to stay put. Understood?"

Snake Eyes nodded. Oh, he _understood, _all right…he just didn't see the point of enforced boredom.

"Good." Doc shook his head ruefully. "I was starting to wonder why people were laughing whenever they asked how you were doing. I'll be back later to check up on you both. Lifeline will be dropping by every hour." He left.

"Nice of him to tell you the guard schedule." Ace was still snorting with laughter.

*Very.* Snake Eyes grinned. *He'll learn…I hope. Makes it too easy otherwise.*

He stood, limped over to Ace's bed, and snatched the remote off of the pilot's bedside table before the pilot could so much as lunge to protect the item. Ace glared at the ninja. "Hey!"

*I told you that I was going to take it.* Snake Eyes settled himself on his bed, back propped against the wall and legs stretched out in front of him. He flipped to the Discovery Channel.

"No!" Ace groaned. "I don't want to _learn!"_

*Good for you.*

"I hate you…Bats? Really?" The pilot shuddered. "I _hate_ bats."

*Better than wrestling.* Snake Eyes turned the volume up.

"You are a cruel man."

*Ninja. Comes with the training.*

He eventually relinquished the remote to the pilot when Scarlett poked her head in. She tugged the curtain around his bed shut, and Snake Eyes peeled off his mask to sip at the thermos of tea that she'd brought him.

"So, it's begun." She perched herself on the edge of the bed and frowned down at him as he smiled.

*I'm fine, really. There's really no point in keeping me here.* He shrugged. *I could get something useful done instead of killing my brain with Cartoon Network."

"Hey." She elbowed him in the side, scowling. "Don't badmouth Cartoon Network…at least you did stay put for twenty four hours. Probably exactly, if I know you."

*To the minute.* He smiled. *And I've still got an Uzi to clean, twelve throwing stars to sharpen, and gear damage reports to fill out…I tore my bodysuit up pretty good."

"You are so stubborn." She stood, leaned down, and kissed him on the head. He caught her around the waist and pulled her down to kiss her firmly on the lips.

*I'm fine, Shana. Don't worry about me.*

She grinned down at him, a flash of humor in her eyes. "Well, if you're sure…I do have money on the line."

"Good odds, too." Ace's voice cut in. "Betting picked right up when you took off, Snake."

"I've got work to do. I'll be in again later." Scarlett kissed Snake Eyes again and left.

He finished the thermos and left the empty container on his bedside table. He stood, glanced at the clock, and limped to the door.

"Round two?" Ace snickered.

Snake Eyes ignored the pilot and cracked the door open. He glanced up and down the hall, then closed the door, leaving it just barely ajar. He returned to his bed, pausing to glare at Ace. *Spill any information to the medics, and you will never walk again.*

"My lips are sealed." Ace promised.

Snake stood on his bed, levered up a ceiling panel, and caught the edge of the sturdy steel supports that the tiles rested on, and pulled himself up through sheer upper body strength. Bracing himself with one arm and his good leg, he replaced the ceiling tile, and slunk off.

Silent movement was difficult with the cast, but he managed. His progress was slower than usual, but then he wasn't in any particular hurry. He paused as running feet and voices passed close by. He recognized Lifeline's voice.

"Yeah, gone again. Doc's having a fit, and Ace was apparently asleep…swears up and down that he didn't hear or see anything."

Flint's voice answered, sounding as if the warrant officer was amused and trying to hide it. "Of course. He's running the books on this; he wouldn't break under Cobra interrogation."

The voices faded with the footsteps. A few more yards and Snake Eyes rolled onto his back and carefully cracked open a trapdoor, eeling his way up and through. He came out under the ancient, battered couch in the rec room. Up a bookshelf and through the ceiling panels, and then a few hundred yards and he was dropping carefully down onto his own bed. Scarlett had packed his weaponry away; he retrieved it and settled down to finish cleaning his firearms.

Thirty minutes later, and there was a sharp rap on his door. Snake slipped the _shuriken _he was sharpening back into its pouch, slid weapons and whetstone out of sight into his pillowcase. He slid off the bed, and gave the covers a tug to straighten them, then dropped to his back and slid under the bed. He grabbed the underside of the frame, and bracing himself with his arms and his good leg pulled himself up, pressing tightly against the underside of the bed frame. Hidden, he froze in place.

The whole process had taken less than five seconds. The knock came again, harder, and he heard Doc's voice.

"Snake Eyes!"

"Here," That was Duke. "He won't be in the same place again, though." The muffled beeping of Duke keying in the entry code, and the door swung open. Booted feet moved in. "See?" He doesn't use the same hideout twice."

"Damn _ninja._" Doc sighed. "I'm going to take that walking cast off and fit him with the biggest, heaviest monstrosity that I can dream up."

"Good luck with that." Duke actually snorted. "You won't get a damned thing on him that he doesn't want on himself."

"Tranquilizers do wonders." Doc said, his voice hard. The medic was glancing in the bathroom.

"And how would you plan on getting said drugs into him?" Duke sounded amused. "Shots? He wouldn't let you near him. Pills? I'd like to see you force-feed a ninja pills. Gas? Good luck getting the face mask on him. Tranquilizer gun? Maybe, but we don't have one, and I wouldn't put money on you being able to hit him with a dart anyways."

The two men left, and the door clicked shut. Snake Eyes waited until their footsteps faded away, then emerged from his hiding place and went back to touching up the edge on his throwing stars.

Finally satisfied, he packed the weapons away, moved to the center of his floor, and started moving through his usual stretching routine. He had to modify his usual leg stretches, but felt much better after finishing. He'd been starting to feel stiff after lazing all day in bed.

He dropped to the floor and started pushups, hooking his bad leg over the ankle of his left foot to avoid putting weight on it. Then he flipped over, and went through his usual crunches.

Feeling considerably better, he took a long, hot shower, which felt _fantastic. _Real clothes felt even better…he hated the flimsy drawstring pants and shirt that he'd been given in the infirmary. Hospital clothes, he thought, had been designed purely to make the wearer feel naked.

* * *

Next chappy will be from Scarlett's POV, and will contain smut. WOOHOO!


	4. Chapter 4

Snake Eyes' exploits from Scarlett's point of view…also, the sweet loving that was promised, because smut is good.

Also, Doc basically beating his head against the wall in frustration. Sorry, Doc. I like you, really I do.

Also, my _Sensei _was the inspiration for the disdain of air conditioning in the summer…actually, he likes to turn the heater on when he thinks the students aren't looking. In August. Then he'll run endurance classes.

Keep in mind, he was a Green Beret and picked up Tang Soo Do in Okinawa from traditional schools. This man has very little tolerance for whining, trains us _old school. _(read; very traditionally, which means two options; hard and, and harder. It is _not _one of the wimpy McDojo lovefest schools that are freaking everywhere today) The man is basically carved from solid granite. And yes, he does give us frequent water breaks, so we don't get heatstroke. Still…it's, shall I say, _intense, _the first few times before you get used to it.

* * *

Scarlett hummed to herself as she headed back to her and Snake's room after hand to hand for a shower. The _dojo _was hot, and her _gi_ was soaked. She wanted a shower.

While the _dojo_ could be air-conditioned, like the rest of the Pit, Snake Eyes considered climate control while training to be "soft". Scarlett thought that this had more than a little to do with the fact that her boyfriend had spent uncountable hours in the steamy Japanese summer sun sweating his way through the brutal _ninjtsu _training methods of the Arashikage clan. Scarlett had become more or less accustomed to the heat, and had eventually come to agree with her lover that a little discomfort was good for developing concentration and discipline amongst the students.

She was halfway to their room when Lifeline pelted around the corner. "Scarlett!"

She hid a smile. "I don't know where he is…didn't you just drag him back to the infirmary?"

Well, yesterday. Snake Eyes had let himself be caught and dragged back to the infirmity roughly six hours after his second disappearance. After a fully-filled out equipment damage report in the commando's neat cursive had appeared on the quartermaster's desk, apparently when the man had stepped out of his office to the coffeepot in the hall just outside. He'd been gone all of fifteen seconds, and hadn't seen a damned thing.

Snake Eyes had finally been corralled down in the shooting range, calmly reducing a lineup of targets to confetti with his Uzis. Doc had quickly got wind of the ninja's whereabouts, and had wasted no time marching the commando back to his cot in the medical ward.

Scarlett knew her man well enough to realize that Snake Eyes' capture had a lot more to do with the fact that Roadblock habitually fixed incapacitated Joes meals than because, as Doc had assumed, the ninja's leg was slowing him down.

Lifeline ran a hand through his hair. "Well, keep an eye out…he just up and vanished for the third time. Doc was actually in the room, this time…checking on Ace. Poor man's almost apoplectic; he still can't figure out how a man in a cast can vanish without a sound in less than ten seconds." The medic sighed. "I keep telling him…ninja. Doc swears that he's going to put restraints on him when he finds our good commando again. He also doesn't understand why everyone seems to be taking this whole situation so lightly."

"He really hasn't been around long, has he?" Scarlett laughed. "Did he go to Hawk yet?"

"He did…Hawk didn't even blink. Said, and I quote, "Good to see my commando's keeping in practice.""

"I'm sure that went over well."

"Oh, yeah." Lifeline winced. "You know, Doc's got this one vein in his temple that starts throbbing when he's really upset?"

"No." Scarlett frowned.

"Neither did I." Lifeline sighed. "Well, Doc told me not to come back until I had word of our errant ninja…If you see him, please let me know."

"Will do." Scarlett promised.

"Thank you. You're the one person that man will listen to, other than Hawk." Lifeline trotted off.

Scarlett kept moving, smiling to herself. On the occasions when Snake Eyes ended up needing medical care, the G.I. Joe senior officer tended to figure that the commando's frequent escapes was good practice for the ninja. Sure, if the ninja was really in a bad way the senior officer would flat-out order Snake Eyes to comply with the medics…i.e., when the ninja hooked up to IV lines, missing a pint or two of blood, and with several ounces of bullets, knives, _shuriken_, or assorted other projectiles lodged in his body. Aside from that, it was generally assumed that Snake Eyes was a tough man, and that trying to keep him in medical was a lost cause.

In their room, she peeled off her _gi_, folded it, set it on top of the dresser, and headed for the shower. Feeling considerably more human, she dragged a brush through her hair and headed towards the dresser.

Suddenly, a pair of strong arms wrapped themselves around her from behind, and Snake Eyes was nuzzling at the back of her neck. Scarlett, though she was used to her lover's tendency to appear whenever he chose and completely without warning, still yelped and jumped.

"_Snake_!" She twisted to glare at the entirely-too-smug looking ninja. "Dammit! Don't do that! Where the hell did you come from, anyways?"

*Secret.* He signed. *I'd tell you, but I'd have to kill you.* His hands moved back to her waist, slid down over her hips. *And I'd really rather not kill you…I've got other plans for you right now.* He smiled, his teeth white-he wasn't wearing his mask.

She hid a smile. "How in the world can you be horny when you're in a cast and just spent the last two days dodging medics?"

He gave her a plaintive look. *It's been awhile…and I'm hurt, not _dead.*_

"It's been three days." She poked him in the chest.

*Like I said. A long time.*

"You are completely hopeless." She shook her head, but she was smiling; it was nice, she had to admit, to know that your man could have broken limbs, might have to use ancient ninja secrets to slip the medical staff and sneak into his own room, but still couldn't keep his hands off of you.

*I'm a guy. I can't help it.* He shrugged.

"You know, I did promise Lifeline that I'd let him know when I saw you…Doc's running the poor man ragged after your sneaky backside."

Snake Eyes abruptly pulled her closer and started nibbling at the tip of her ear. It took Scarlett a few seconds to remember how her voice worked. She meant to say that she felt sorry for Lifeline, and Snake should really let the combat medic catch a glimpse of himself, just to get the poor medic off his feet for awhile. What came out was "Oh…nice…"

She felt him smile, and her boyfriend moved lower, to that sensitive little patch of skin right under her ear. Lips brushed, and the warm swipe of a tongue scrambled her thoughts even more.

She planted her hands on his chest and steered him backwards until the back of his knees hit the edge of the chair by her desk. He sat down, and she slid into his lap. She slid her hands around the back of his neck and kissed him, hard.

Her towel vanished, and landed on the bed halfway across the room. She grabbed at his shirt, and tugged it off. The abruptly flaring heat between her thighs and crackling under her skin surprised her a little, but not much. He'd always had that effect on her, after all…she could be dead tired, sore, muddy, covered in blood (hers and others) and he'd still give her a look, a word, a kiss, and she'd forget everything else.

He raised his hips as she worked his pants down; there was a moment of difficulty in sliding the BDU pants off over his cast, but she managed. She slid back into his lap, pressing up against him, trying to touch as much of him at once as possible. His hands slid around her, up her back, pulling her even closer.

_Oh, yes._ She kissed him again, and he was kissing her slowly, deeply, and she felt herself coming completely undone.

He lifted her by the hips, and when she slid down on him she sighed against his lips. He smiled.

He set the pace, and it was slow, gentle, and set all of her nerve endings on fire. It was a long time before she finally stifled her final moan against his shoulder, and felt him tense under her, and then give in with a long shudder.

"Mmm." She sighed against him, contented. He wrapped his arms around her, rested his chin on her head, and just held her for a long, blissful moment.

She finally pulled back and eyed him. "I'd rib you for looking that smug, but I think that you just earned it."

His grin spread. *You're welcome.*

"You know, you really should go and let Lifeline at least catch a glimpse of you. Doc won't let him rest until he's got word of you."

He shook his head and leered at her. *I'm quite comfy here.*

She smacked him on the shoulder. "Smartass…if you go and hurry about it, you might get seconds."

He was on his feet, depositing her on the bed, and pulling on his pants in roughly a tenth of a second. She laughed aloud. "God, you are so _easy_ to manipulate, my dear."

*I'm easily motivated by sex.* He reached for his shirt. *Comes with the Y chromosome.* He limped rapidly out the door, and knowing him, vanished promptly.

Scarlett leaned back against the pillows, smiling to herself. So long as she knew he wasn't in danger, she actually found her lover's regular evasion of medical care rather amusing. So did the rest of the base. There was, in addition, the fact that not sleeping next to her for a few days tended to make Snake Eyes _very_ affectionate. He tended to track her down and drag her to privacy after the first two or three days; today had been no exception.

Actually, when he was sleeping next to her he tended to be quite…affectionate. She closed her eyes, considering a nap. She hoped Doc gave up on his prescription of bed rest for her ninja soon; she missed his solid warmth next to her at night.

Plus, she was set to clear almost two grand if Doc gave up after five escapes.


	5. Chapter 5

Ninja bait, restraints, and more betting.

* * *

Snake Eyes watched with interest as Carl Greer's already dark face went even darker. The doctor was actually sputtering in rage. Finally, the man seemed to pull himself under control enough to form coherent words.

"What…are…you…_doing?!"_

*Kata.* Snake Eyes signed. He paused, then moved his hands again. *Well, sort of…I can't really do them properly with a cast, but I can go through the motions.*

"You're not supposed to BE doing them!"

*It's been a few days.* Snake pointed out calmly. *I wanted to at least walk through them…just to keep in form.* He'd worked his way up through the beginner and intermediate _kata, _and had just been starting on the advanced forms when Doc had burst into the room, glowering.

It was the fourth time that Snake Eyes had escaped, after being trapped for the third time. Well, not really _trapped, _more _lured; _Lifeline, showing a great deal of ingenuity, had set up a camp stove in the medical ward, raided Snake's stash of tea from the rec room's tiny kitchen, and put on a pot of Dragon Mountain.

Snake Eyes had a serious weakness for the expensive, aromatic, superbly delicate and exceptionally flavorful blend; it was one of his few indulgences, but he always made sure that he had some on hand. He'd decided that letting a pot go to waste was worse than sitting through yet another lecture from the well-meaning-and-increasingly-frustrated Doc.

Of course, he'd left again as soon as the tea was gone and Doc's back was turned. That had been three hours ago; it was getting close to dinnertime, and he knew that Roadblock was making chicken alfredo for Ace…and himself, if he happened to be in the infirmary. He'd let Lifeline catch sight of him slipping into the _dojo._ Doc had appeared minutes later.

"Bed…_Move!"_ Doc growled. "Or so help me god, I _will_ stick you with a tranquilizer and _drag_ you back. Lord, if not for the Hippocratic Oath, I would just _strangle_ you into submission, I _swear."_

Snake Eyes let himself be goaded towards the infirmary. Doc was still grumbling under his breath about "Hardheaded patients who just _knew so much better_ than the man who'd actually _spent eight years in school for this sort of thing…"_

When they reached the medical ward, Snake Eyes spotted a steaming tray on his bed and made a beeline for the food. He was just finishing when he paused, listening.

He pulled on his mask, set the tray on the bedside table, stood, and pulled the curtain aside, glaring at Doc. The medic, on tiptoe and reaching for the curtain, a syringe in hand, froze.

*You are not tranquilizing me.* Snake Eyes frowned.

"Watch me." Doc glared back at him. "I told you that I'd put restraints on you if you slipped out again."

*You're welcome to give that a try.* Snake nodded at the needle and narrowed his eyes. *But it won't work.*

"I didn't think you'd just let me." Doc grinned tightly. "So I brought along some help…Roadblock? Heavy Duty? Flint? Duke?"

Snake Eyes eyed Doc's office as the door opened and the four men filed out, looking vaguely apprehensive. *There is really no need for that.*

"Oh?" Doc's eyebrows rose. "Could you four please hold him down for a second then get him on the bed? This injection won't take long to start working."

Snake Eyes sighed, turned, and sat down on his bed. He lay down. *Really no need for that. If you want to put restraints on me, go ahead. You don't need to put me out for it.*

Doc blinked. So did the other four men. "What?" The doctor sounded shocked. He lowered the syringe.

*Are you just going to stand there? I thought that you'd relish the chance to get me to stay put.* Snake Eyes spread out, lining up ankles and wrists with the restraint straps. He moved one hand to sign. *Go ahead.*

Doc edged forwards, clearly sure that the ninja was going to bolt for freedom at any moment. Snake Eyes didn't move. Doc lunged, and quickly had the ankle straps fastened.

Snake settled himself a bit more comfortably, but didn't move otherwise. Doc buckled down his wrists, and stepped back still looking vaguely surprised. "Well…" He rubbed at the back of his neck. "That was easy." He turned to the four muscular Joes behind him. "Guess I won't need you."

Flint looked at Snake, eyebrows raised. Snake Eyes smiled. The warrant officer shook his head and went to talk to Ace. Duke, trying mightily not to laugh, sauntered out of the room. Roadblock and Heavy Duty followed Flint.

Snake Eyes heard animated whispered betting taking place to his left. It was apparently over how long he'd actually remain restrained. Doc, who didn't have ninja training, didn't seem to hear. He was still eyeing the ninja, triumph plain on his face.

"Told you, you aren't the first reluctant patient I've had." The medic took off his glasses and polished them on his shirt. "I've never lost a clash yet." He put the glasses back on, looking quite pleased with himself.

Snake Eyes shrugged.

"Enjoy yourself…I'll be back in just a few minutes." Doc spun on his heel and headed for the door. "I'm going to see if there's any of Roadblock's pasta left. I deserve a treat after the last couple of days."

As soon as the medic vanished, Heavy Duty poked his head around the curtain. "Snake!" His voice was urgent. "If you can get out in less than ten minutes, I win Flint and Roadblock's money! Three hundred, and I'll split it with you if you come and help me clean the .50 cal installments from the Wolverines."

Snake Eyes curled thumb and index finger into the "Ok" symbol. The machine gunner grinned. "Great. See you in a few…we'll leave now."

They did. Snake Eyes eyed the sturdy leather straps around his wrists and ankles. He took a breath, flexed his fingers _just_ so, and pulled against the restraints.

He felt bones grind together. Joints crackled as he ignored the pain and bent them in directions that they'd never been meant to go. He slid his hands free, and sat up, flexing his fingers and shaking his hands. Joints popped back into place, and he sighed in relief.

From there, it was simple to unbuckle his feet. Compared to Cobra interrogation facilities and even the complicated knot work used by the Hard and Soft masters to test the escape skills of their students, medical restraints were a cakewalk.

He poked his head around the curtain. *I'm out, and half of that money is mine when you collect…Heavy Duty's splitting it with me for my help with his chores.*

Ace glanced at the clock. "Three and a half minutes. Nice."

Snake Eyes snorted. *Thirty seconds. I waited until everyone was well away before I even started trying.*

Ace grinned. "No wonder Cobra hates you so much, man."

Snake Eyes smiled and trotted off, slipping into his wall passageway and making his way down to the armory.

* * *

Well, that didn't work so well, did it? Sorry Doc, but you'll have to come up with something else…or just give up already.


	6. Chapter 6

Snake Eyes and Doc get into it, and Doc proves himself just as sneaky in his own way as our dear ninja. Also, Doc doesn't give up easily.

Temazepam is an oral sedative, according to Wikipedia and WebMD, which not being a doctor I base my medical knowledge on.

* * *

Snake and Heavy Duty were on the last three 50 cal installments when Snake Eyes cocked his head, listening. The distinctive footstep cadence approaching the motor pool sent him scrambling for hiding. He scooted underneath one of the Wolverines and clung to the underside of the tank as Lifeline trotted in.

"Hey." Heavy Duty's voice was cordial, but neutral.

"Have you seen Snake Eyes?" Lifeline cut right to the point. "Doc apparently somehow got restraints on him, left, and came back five minutes later to find him gone." A long sigh. "Poor man…I could have told him that he'd need to sedate Snake to keep him put-even in restraints. God only knows how he got the things buckled with our ninja awake."

Heavy Duty started laughing. "He let him. Doc pulled me, Duke, Flint, and Roadblock into the infirmary earlier. We were supposed to hold Snake down long enough for Doc to sedate him. But Snake Eyes, he just laid down, calm as anything, and let Doc strap him down. Doc apparently thought that'd be enough to get our ninja to stay put, because he didn't put him out once he was strapped down."

Lifeline snorted. "Well, he's learned his lesson now. So, has our errant ninja been through here? I'm starting to fear for Doc's sanity."

"Haven't seen him." Heavy Duty lied without the slightest bit of guilt creeping into his voice. "That doesn't mean he hasn't been through, of course. I'd trail Scarlett if I were you and Doc. Snake is almost always within twenty yards of that woman when he's not working."

"Yeah…that's true." Snake watched as Lifeline's boots started moving back towards the door. "Thanks anyways, and if he shows up let me know."

"Okay." Heavy Duty again lied like a pro.

Snake Eyes waited until the medic's footsteps had faded away before emerging from hiding. *Thanks.*

"Anytime." Heavy Duty turned back to his work. "Well, so long as you're helping with my chores, anyways."

It didn't take the two of them long to finish. Snake Eyes slipped away just in time to watch the return of Lifeline with amusement from a tiny peephole bored in his safely hidden crawlspace in the wall. The medic was now peering under and into vehicles with a penlight, looking distinctly disgruntled.

Snake Eyes made his way up to the dojo, intending to train for a bit. He found Scarlett working knife techniques and Doc, temple vein throbbing, peering through the door every few moments as if expecting the ninja to materialize at any second.

Snake Eyes settled himself comfortably over the ceiling tiles. He liked watching Scarlett train; she was good-very good- and graceful, and it was a pleasure to watch her move. Plus, she was _very _easy on the eyes, after all.

After a few minutes, though, he moved on. Stopping by his room he grabbed his Uzis and cleaning equipment, then made his way to the roof.

It was a nice afternoon out, warm and sunny, but not unpleasantly hot. Snake Eyes set his firearms aside in favor of running through _kata_. His cast made him awkward, but he felt good after walking through his techniques.

He moved from _kata_ into weapons defenses for guns, knives, and clubs. From there, grappling and ground defenses and counters for unarmed attacks and grabs.

Four hours and a stint spent hiding from a search party later, and he'd walked through nearly his entire, very extensive inventory of techniques. Still feeling good, he settled himself on the edge of the waist-high wall that edged the flat roof and slipped into meditation, enjoying the warm sun, the slight breeze, and the distant scent of late lilacs.

He was feeling completely at peace with the world when he at last started stripping down his Uzis. He was meticulously cleaning any trace of carbon buildup and dust from the firearms when he heard footsteps on the stair a second time. He considered hiding again, but decided against it. Ace should have collected by now; he could pick up his portion of the winnings.

He turned slightly to nod politely as Tunnel Rat poked his head out of the stairwell. The short man stared, then ducked back down the stairs for the intercom just inside the stairwell door.

"I found him!" Snake Eyes could hear the electronically transmitted and amplified voice echoing through the Pit. "He's on the roof!"

Snake Eyes returned to assembling his now-clean and freshly oiled guns. Tunnel Rat edged up to him, not taking his eyes off the ninja for a moment. Doc and Lifeline burst out of the stairwell five minutes later, just as Snake Eyes was clicking the last parts of his second Uzi back into place.

"You!" Doc's face was an interesting shade of dark purple. "_I had you in restraints!"_

*Ninja.* Snake Eyes slid his guns into their holsters and hopped off of the narrow wall.

"I _know_ I had those restraints properly fastened!" Doc narrowed his eyes. "Did someone let you out?"

*No.* Snake signed calmly. *I'm a ninja. I'm quite capable of getting out of basic medical restraints on my own.*

"You stubborn _idiot!_" Doc was snarling. "I've _told_ you that I wanted you in bed for a reason. You had a bloody _concussion_-a fairly bad one, and it's a miracle that you didn't smash your head open, hard skull notwithstanding-not four days ago! Dizziness, nausea, and headaches can flare up without warning for up to a week afterward. And what do you do? _Climb on the damned roof!"_ He leveled a finger at Snake. "And I just saw you sitting on the very edge of that safety wall, so don't give me any bull about being perfectly safe. What if you'd had a dizzy spell up there? It's fifty feet straight down to pavement, and I don't care what kind of crazy skills you have, or how good a surgeon I am. You fall off of that, and I am _not_ going to be able to find all of the bits to put you back together! _Stupid…Bloody…NINJA!"_

He paused, struggling for control. "Bed. _Now." _The medic pointed down the stairs, his glare daring Snake Eyes to fight him. Snake Eyes, somewhat taken aback by the medic's outburst, went meekly enough. Tunnel Rat was staring open mouthed at Doc, obviously stunned.

Still… *I'm just fine.* Snake Eyes turned on the stairs to glare at Doc, pointedly keeping up his pace down the stairwell without bothering to watch his footing. *I haven't had any nausea, or dizzy spells, or headaches. Keeping me in bed is pointless.*

"I decide that, not you, and it is _not_ pointless." Doc growled. "Do you have a medical degree? _No_. Your knowledge of medicine is limited to keeping yourself and others from bleeding out until I or Lifeline can get there. You _cause _injuries, not fix them. You had a head injury, and symptoms can and do pop up without warning, and you're going to hurt yourself pushing like this. Plus, you have a broken leg, and you really shouldn't be pushing this hard until it heals at least a little."

*I've had broken bones before.* Snake Eyes shrugged. *I know what I'm capable of.*

"No, you know what you want to be capable of." Doc sighed. "Whatever skills you may have-and I'll be the first to admit that your skills are _very _impressive- you're still human, ninja. After you get hurt, there's no ancient meditation technique that can stitch skin and muscle back together and heal bone. That takes _time, _whether you like it or not."

Snake turned away, pointedly ignoring the medic. Lifeline, just ahead of him, was looking distinctly nervous at the fact that he was in a small, enclosed area with a very irritated doctor and an exasperated, irritated ninja.

Back in the infirmary, Snake Eyes snatched the remote from the hands of a very startled Ace, who was wise enough not to disparage the ninja's choice of programming. Snake Eyes propped his shoulders against the wall and stared at the television, still pointedly ignoring Doc. The medic sighed, and beckoned Lifeline into his office.

Lifeline left shortly after, and showed up twenty minutes later with a tray. "You missed supper." He said by way of explanation, as Snake Eyes looked at him. "It's not Roadblock's cooking, but it's pretty good; shrimp jambalaya. Hope you like spicy food."

Snake Eyes didn't mind spicy food. The jambalaya _was _good; he hadn't realized how hungry he was. Lifeline had also provided a thermos of iced tea, remembering that Snake Eyes wasn't fond of soda.

He finished and Lifeline took the tray and thermos. Snake Eyes pulled back the curtain a bit and glanced at Doc's office; the door was shut, and he could hear the soft clicking of fingers on a computer keyboard. He stood.

…and abruptly sat back down, blinking hard. His head spun, and his eyelids suddenly very much wanted to close. He shook his head, and stood again, swaying.

Doc was suddenly right in front of him, looking very smug. "Enjoy the jambalaya?" The medic's voice was conversational.

*You…* Snake's hands and brain didn't seem to be communicating properly.

"One of the nice things about spicy food is that even a ninja can't taste a little added Temazepam." Doc said mildly. "I'd sit down if I were you."

Snake Eyes did, mostly because his feet had decided that they weren't going to support him for much longer. He blinked again, and only managed to drag his eyelids open again through sheer willpower.

"Lie down." Doc advised. "You look like you're about to fall over. You'll be out for seven to nine hours, which will be a rather refreshing break for me and Lifeline. I may decide that I like not chasing you around and stick you with another sedative before you come around. I told you, I've never lost a clash with a reluctant patient yet."

Snake Eyes let himself fall back against the pillows, glaring at Doc through narrowed eyes. *You…_dead_.*

"Mmhm." Doc didn't sound worried. "Not for awhile, I'm not. Enjoy your nap."

Snake Eyes glared as the doctor ambled back to his office, and then gravity and medication won out over willpower. His eyes slid shut, and everything went black.


	7. Chapter 7

The conclusion of one of my longer stories…I've been working on my other one, too, I swear!

In which Scarlett and Doc chat, and Doc gets to argue with a very much put out ninja. Satisfying conclusions are reached, though Doc might have an ass-beating looming in the not-too-distant future.

* * *

Scarlett dropped by the infirmary after she finished working her weapon techniques. First, however, she stopped at the rec room and made a pot of tea.

She sipped from her own mug as she leaned on the medical center's lever handle with one elbow and bumped the door open with her hip. Snake Eyes had long ago turned her into almost as much of a tea snob as himself. He was, she knew, quite proud of this fact.

The door swung open and she paused, blinking. Snake Eyes was sprawled on his bed, soundly asleep. Someone had removed his visor, though his mask was still on, and his boot, Uzis, and visor were stacked neatly next to his bed. Whoever had made the ninja more comfortable had also draped a blanket over him, which moved as the ninja's chest rose and fell.

Scarlett glanced at the clock. It was only seven thirty. Even for BeachHead that was a little early. It was _certainly_ too early for Snake Eyes; she and Snake didn't usually turn in until about ten. Plus, Snake didn't usually sleep on his back; most people might not have thought twice about that, but Scarlett was intimately familiar with the man. She knew him perhaps better than anyone else alive, and she knew his sleeping habits. She _should._ She'd slept next to him for close to three years, after all.

Doc poked his head out of his office. "Ah. Scarlett. I've been expecting you."

"Is Snake Eyes ok?" She asked bluntly. "It isn't like him to be asleep so early."

Though Doc hadn't ever been told about their relationship, he was a smart and observant man. He'd figured things out quickly enough, and now didn't even raise an eyebrow at her familiarity with Snake Eyes' sleep schedule. He took off his glasses, calmly polishing a smudge from the lens. "Oh, he's fine." The medic smiled, and Scarlett frowned.

"What did you do to him?" Scarlett's voice was a low, dangerous purr.

"Easy, there. He's already sworn to kill me once he comes around. I don't need you both gunning for me." Doc took the thermos from her and took a gulp. "This is good. I'll have to ask him where he gets it." He examined her expression and sighed. "I slipped an oral sedative into his supper. He'll come around in…" Doc glanced at the clock, "…another six to eight hours. He might be a little groggy, sluggish and hung over, but none worse for the wear. Then he and I are going to have a nice little chat."

Scarlett raised her eyebrows. "He is _not_ going to be happy with you."

"Oh, I know." Doc smiled just a little. "I've planned for that. I'll also accept the asskicking that I'm sure is coming my way next time I have mandatory hand-to-hand. But we need to reach some sort of understanding, he and I, or one of two things is going to happen. He'll hurt himself, or I'm going to break the Hippocratic Oath and murder him."

She smiled. "He's always been like this, and he's still around, even if sometimes I have to sit on him while Hawk flat out orders him to comply with medical instructions. He's broken other medics, you know."

Doc smiled again, a glint of teeth in his dark face. "They weren't me. I care about my patients, and I care about what they might do to themselves, even if they don't. I'll fight him to the end if I think that he's putting himself in danger."

"I hope you know what you're doing." Scarlett shook her head.

"Yeah. So do I." He laughed softly. "I'll admit, a ninja is a new challenge for me. How _does_ he vanish out from under my nose so fast, anyways?"

Scarlett shrugged. "He doesn't tell that even to me. It's what he does; you get used to it eventually. He gives the Cobra Commander nightmares." She grinned.

Doc sighed. "I suspected as much. Come back in tomorrow after PT if he's still here."

"Do Duke and Hawk know about this?"

"No. This is between me and our commando." Doc hesitated. "Though…if he kills me, could you help Lifeline explain the situation to our commanding officer?"

Scarlett snorted. "Sure, hang me out to dry. Thanks a _lot."_

"Well, I'm going to go shower and turn in." Doc drained the thermos and handed it back to her. "I've got an exciting early morning of fighting with a groggy, angry ninja to look forwards to. Think BeachHead would excuse me from PT if I show up with a few dozen broken bones?"

"Probably." Scarlett smiled. "Goodnight and good luck. You'll need it."

The medic sighed. "Don't remind me." He headed out of the infirmary.

"Doc's dead." Ace observed as soon as the doctor was gone.

"Yeah." Scarlett went and sat down on the edge of Snake Eyes' bed. "He is." She cupped Snake Eyes' jaw, running her thumb affectionately over his cheekbone. Even deep in a medicated sleep, he sighed quietly and turned into her touch ever so slightly. She leaned down and kissed him on the forehead.

"Let Doc live." She told the unconscious man softly. "He's a good guy, and he's just looking out for your stubborn butt. That kind of makes me like him."

* * *

Snake Eyes drifted back to consciousness slowly, and then still had to fight to peel his eyelids open. They felt heavy and itchy, and his head felt like it was filled with cotton. He really felt like he had a hangover, which was a sensation that he hadn't felt for a _very_ long time. It wasn't something that he'd particularly ever wanted to feel again.

He blinked up at the ceiling, trying to convince himself that he could, in fact, move. Doc. He needed to kill Doc. Right.

He levered himself into a sitting position and immediately regretted it. The room spun, and the remnants of the medication in his system were still fighting to drag him back down into soft darkness.

It was a measure of just how out of it he still was that it took him a few minutes to notice that his visor was gone, someone had taken his boot off of his good foot, and that his Uzis weren't where he'd left them in their holsters. Someone had also thoughtfully draped a blanket over him.

"Ah. He wakes." Snake Eyes carefully turned his head towards the voice and blinked several times to bring Doc's face into focus.

*You.* He signed clumsily. *Gonna _hurt_ you.*

"Yeah, well, I've got another half-hour or so before you can stand without falling over, so I'm not too worried yet." Doc pulled up a chair and sat down. "Your equipment is by your bed, so don't fret about it. Scarlett stopped by last night just after you went under; I think that she'd like you to let me live, if her opinion carries any weight with you. I think that it does." Doc smiled at him.

*Can maim you.* Snake scowled.

"I'm sure you could." Doc held out a water bottle. "Here. You have to have terrible cotton-mouth right now. That particular family of sedatives will do that."

Snake accepted the water, but hesitated. Doc narrowed his eyes. "I've seen you without that mask before, and I don't really give a damn what you look like, so go ahead. I'm sure as hell not leaving right now, and I know you're thirsty, so it's really up to you."

Snake Eyes reluctantly tugged his mask up far enough to gulp at the blessedly cold water. Doc didn't flinch at the exposed scarring, which did gain him a few points with Snake, but not enough for the ninja to stop considering all the ways to break every bone in the medic's body with his bare hands.

"Now." Doc's voice was conversational. "While you're still stuck here and unable to murder me, I'd like to have a little chat."

Snake Eyes glared, and went to swing his legs over the edge of the bed. Then he sat back again as two Docs briefly spun before him.

"Obviously," Doc said, "we have some issues here. You don't like medical confinement, and after reviewing your file I can understand why. Still, you're in a line of work where you _will_ get injured, and you _will _end up on my table probably more often than either of us would like. Now, I understand that you don't see the point of medical confinement currently, and I understand that most of the base seems to view your exploits with some kind of tolerant humor. I'm also not blind to the betting pool being run in my infirmary." Doc glared in Ace's direction; the pilot was still snoring happily.

*Is pointless.* Snake signed, still trying to get his eyes to stay focused.

"No, it's not." Doc sighed. "I'm not doing any of this for my own enjoyment, you know. I give the orders I do because I care about my patients and want to see them get better and out of my hands as quickly as possible. I've dealt with your kind before; you think that pushing as soon after an injury as possible will get you better more quickly. It doesn't always work like that. Sometimes, you can end up making things worse, and that means that you'll have to deal with me for even longer." The medic sipped at a coffee mug. "Sometimes, you just have to lay back and let yourself heal for a few days-or weeks-before you're really up to doing what you want to do again."

*Don't like lying around all day.*

"I know you don't, and I really don't care. Now, I have a bargain to propose to you." Doc took another mouthful of coffee and grimaced. "I have to teach these people how to brew this stuff...Anyways, you're right."

_That_ took Snake Eyes by surprise. He blinked. *What?*

"You haven't shown any symptoms of complications from your concussion. You probably are fine, and I'm willing to release you. But there are conditions, and remember, I could just stick you with this." Doc held up a syringe. "And I _know_ you'll stay put for awhile longer. I doubt that you'll be able to dodge me right now. Then, I could hook you up to an IV and keep you in one place until I was sure that you'd rested enough."

Snake Eyes scowled again. *I'd _kill _you.*

"Yeah, well, that's a risk I'm willing to take." Doc shrugged. "I swore the Hippocratic Oath. I'll make sure that if, by any action, I can keep you from harm, I'll do it. Even if that involves protecting you from your own actions, and even if you don't like it." He smiled thinly at Snake Eyes' open frown. "I know, I'm a cruel man."

"Anyways, I'm willing to discharge you to light duty on the following conditions. One; _light_ duty. That means _take it easy._ And I want you back in here once a day so that I can keep an eye on you. Also, in the future, I will not confine you to the infirmary unless I think it completely necessary. Second condition however, is that if I ask you to check in at regular intervals for observation, you will do so. Third; if I do deem it necessary for you to spend some time in my medical center, you will trust that I am doing it for your own good and you will _not_ fight me-at least until you are out of immediate danger. I spent many years in school for the express purpose of keeping people alive and healthy, and I did it because that's what I care about. I do not particularly care that the people I save like me; their continued healthy existence is enough praise for me. Do we have an understanding?"

*You drugged me.* Snake Eyes glared. *I _really _don't like being drugged against my will.*

"You're coming around a bit more…getting more lucid, anyways." Doc smiled. "Remember this, too; you have to eat and drink sometime, ninja, and I'm a very inventive and sometimes very subtle man with a large pharmacopoeia at my fingertips. It would be far easier on me simply to sedate you and hook you up to IV's for a few days whenever you end up in my care, and if that's what it takes to get you to stay put and heal, I have no problem doing so. I think that you would _not _like that arrangement nearly as much as my other proposal."

Snake Eyes considered for a long moment. *Still going to beat you through the floor.*

"I expected as much." Doc nodded.

*Not promising that I won't vanish on you.*

"So long as you do it after your life isn't in immediate danger any longer. Hawk apparently thinks that it's good practice for you anyways."

*I'll always start working my techniques as soon as I can stand upright.*

"So long as long as you don't do them somewhere where a dizzy spell could send you fifty feet headfirst into cement. You can hide out on the roof, but stay off of the walls and cliff faces until I clear you for regular duty."

*Fine.* Snake sighed.

"Good." Doc got to his feet, looking satisfied. "I swear to God, you are the most difficult patient I've ever dealt with."

Snake Eyes smiled a little at that. He wasn't having as much difficulty focusing now, and his head was starting to clear. *Ninja.*

"Are _all_ ninja as bad as you?" Doc winced at Snake's nod. "Jesus. I'm glad you're the only one I have to battle."

*I may take apprentices someday.* Snake Eyes smiled wickedly at Doc's groan. *I'll train them to be just as stubborn as myself.*

"You would. Now, I'm going to go get some more coffee and change into some clothes that I don't mind BeachHead destroying with his damned obstacle courses. You're free to leave as soon as you can stand without falling over, which by my estimate should be another fifteen or twenty minutes."

In response, Snake Eyes pulled himself to his feet, sternly keeping himself straight even when the room swam for a second. Doc's eyebrows rose. "I'm going to have to adjust dosages of some medicines on you, I just know it." The medic shook his head. "See me tonight after supper, and I'll tell Scarlett that you're supposed to check in once a day for a few more days."

*You learn fast.* Snake Eyes carefully headed for the door. *As soon as this cast comes off, you are dead.*

"Yeah, yeah." Doc followed him out into the hallway. "I'm looking forwards to it. By the way…who had you escaping five times?"

*Scarlett.* Snake Eyes smiled. *Almost sixteen hundred dollars, last I knew.*

Doc laughed aloud at that. "That woman is either very smart or very lucky."

*She knows me, and she's good at judging people.* Snake pointed out. *You know, I could just maim you a_ little _right now.*

Doc did glance back nervously at that. "I'm sure you could."

Snake Eyes suddenly started for him, and the medic was twenty yards down the hallway in the blink of an eye. Snake Eyes _smiled. _Yes, he was going to beat the medic through the practice mats, but he could also torture him a bit first-it'd help make the remaining weeks he had to spend in this damned cast more bearable.

Doc _deserved _a bit of fear for that stunt with the sedative, after all. Snake Eyes headed for his own quarters, the promise of weeks to spend reducing Doc to a nervous wreck cheering him up considerably.

He thought that he might come to quite like the new medic.

Finis


End file.
